Know You're Asleep
by ahiijny
Summary: There's that "I know you're awake" creepypasta story meme thing on the Internet. How might Osaka react in that sort of situation?


A/N: The first sentence is a recap.

* * *

**あずまんが大王 - Azumanga Daioh, Azuma Kiyohiko**

* * *

So basically, it's 5:35 am, and Osaka is lying in the same room as her dead parents, and there's some sort of sentient hairless eyeless caveman-like thing hidden under her bed, waiting to strike.

Osaka swallows nervously, reading the message on the wall written in blood. She remains motionless in her bed. Still, the creature's not striking. Yet.

Osaka turns her gaze to her dead parents. How could this happen? How likely could it be for something like this to happen? Could this be a dream?

Osaka thinks for a moment, and then shakes her head. No, this can't be a dream. It feels too real. But then again, don't lots of dreams feel real? She's sure that she has had dreams before that seemed pretty real. She remembers being very amazed at how detailed and vivid everything had looked in those dreams. She remembers twirling around and admiring the scenery. So this could _potentially_ be a dream. It's not impossible.

Is there a clear-cut way to tell the difference between the real world and a dream world? Hm. Well, if it's real life, then she would know for sure that it's real. But if it's a dream, then she would be unsure whether it's a dream or not. Right?

Osaka plops her head back on her pillow and she stares up at the ceiling. Then again, that's only because nothing ever really implausible happens in real life. She's never had a very doubtful "is this reality?" situation in real life before, so she's never been unsure about reality before. Probably.

Osaka blinks. Actually, it's difficult to tell. She's lived out something like sixteen years of life so far. That's lots of material to sift through. Maybe she _has_ had a doubtful "is this reality?" situation before, and she just forgot it just now. That's possible. Osaka has forgotten lots of stuff before. Like on that question on the test she did yesterday where she searched her brain for the answer, and nothing came up. Is there a way to tell if she's forgotten something? Is it possible for her to somehow go through her mind and find a blank and say "aha, there's somethin' missing here"?

One would think that an "is this reality?" situation would be easy to remember, but Osaka has lots of other stuff to focus on, too. Like school stuff. She got a 42 on that test on the other day. Oh, and also, Yukari-sensei said that one shouldn't use the word "one" too often because it sounds too pompous. And then Yukari-sensei went on with the lesson and she used the word "one" another fifteen times. Roughly fifteen times. Osaka could have miscounted. That's possible.

Osaka rolls over. What was she thinking about again? She's lost her train of thought. Trains. What was invented first, the word "train" or the actual steam train that moved stuff? Hm.

Hm…

…

* * *

Osaka blinks. Sunlight is streaming in through the windows. Her alarm clock displays the time 7:59.

Osaka stretches her arms and yawns for a very long time. She rubs her eyes.

"I fell asleep."

She turns to look at her alarm clock. "Ah… it's this time already? I'd better get goin' to school." Still rubbing the sleep out of her eyes with her left hand, she reaches out with her other hand to pick up her socks off the ground beside her bed.

_SHING_

Osaka feels a sudden nick in her right wrist. She lifts up her head just in time to see something fly across the room and then hit the wall on the far side.

Osaka blinks.

And then an enormous torrent of blood shoots out of her wrist.

Osaka blinks again. "I'm pretty sure I don't have that much blood," she says. She puts her left hand to her chin and looks contemplative. "Also, I'm pretty sure that my blood isn't bein' pumped that forcefully either…"

And then the pain hits. It's like the searing white hot type of pain.

Osaka winces. "Ow!… That's really painful. Really really painful! I don't think I've ever had this much pain b'fore…"

She blinks. "But can dreams be painful? I'm pretty sure that I've had dreams before where I pinched myself and I actually felt th'pinch. It's possible for me to be pained in my dreams, then."

She grimaces. "I never thought that gettin' your hand cut off could be so painful… It's like this pain is in the top percentage of-" She hisses as she feels another wave of pain.

Osaka stares at her bleeding mutilated wrist. "Though I'm not feelin' woozy from blood loss. That's a good sign." She slowly moves the arm around. "What a peculiar feelin'... When I try movin' that hand, there's still nothin' there. No reaction. Just… wow…"

Osaka looks up at the clock again. "Oh no… at this rate, I'm goin' t'be late for school. I'm pretty sure that we've got Yukari-sensei first period today. She'll punish me for sure if I'm late!"

Osaka blinks.

"What were the punishments for bein' late again?"

A few seconds pass in silence.

Osaka bends over the edge of her bed. "Hey monkey-san, do you know what the punish-"

_SHING_

Osaka's hair is suddenly shorter.

"I guess he doesn't know, then," Osaka says, sitting up as she closes her eyes and crosses her arms. "Hm… Ow." She uncrosses her arms.

She looks at her bleeding wrist. "I should probably get this tied up, then." She looks up at the foot of her bed. Her dresser is placed right next to the foot of her bed. Several of her shirts are lying haphazardly on top of the dresser. "Ah, that's it, then!"

Osaka stands up on her bed, wobbles a bit, and then walks over to her dresser.

"What colour would be best be coverin' blood?" Osaka wonders aloud. She spots her pink school uniform top. "Ah, that's perfect!"

She takes the shirt in her left hand and ties a makeshift knot around her bleeding wrist. She watches her tied up wrist for a while to make sure that the knot is tight enough.

"Ah, oh no!" Osaka looks around at her dead mom and dad. "I'll have to make my own obento for lunch, and I'm already short on time!"

She stares at her left hand. "I'll have to act quickly, then."

She quickly steps onto her mom, who's sitting in a chair just beside her bed. Osaka climbs up over her mom's shoulders and head, and jumps off on the other side of the chair.

_CRUNCH_

Osaka turns and sees a sharp hefty butcher knife wedged deeply in the splintered wooden legs of the chair that her mom's sitting in. The wielder of the blade is still concealed under the darkness of the bed. It had probably been aiming for Osaka's ankles, but the chair was in the way.

Osaka stares blankly at the knife for a good ten seconds. Then she wrinkles her nose as she turns away. "That smell of blood doesn't really smell good." She turns to look at her wall. "I should probably clean that off too. It'd really start smellin' after a while. Ah… but I don't know what cleanin' fluids are good for gettin' rid of blood… And how to deal with that corrosive cleanin' stuff…"

She looks alarmedly at her clock. "But I'm still runnin' late! I'll have t'worry about this after I get home from school, then." She quickly grabs her bag as she runs out the bedroom door.

In the kitchen, Osaka is darting around, looking around, and opening and closing the refrigerator. She isn't really sure what she's doing. What kind of lunch can she make in only twelve minutes?

She opens the fridge for the third time and spots the large ham this time. "Ham… and…" she turns her head sharply and spots a loaf of bread on the far side of the room. "…bread! Yes! A ham and bread sandwich. I guess it'll do. It can't be helped."

She hurriedly slams the ham onto a cutting board and grabs the butcher knife from the rack beside the sink. "I'll have to cut it… But I've got no experience with cuttin' this with only my left hand…"

She blinks.

"Or with my right hand."

Suddenly, she hears footsteps quickly approaching. "Huh? Who's there?..."

She starts to turn to look at the kitchen entrance, but she painfully slams her hip into the kitchen counter.

She instinctively recoils immediately, flinging away the butcher knife in favor of clutching her hip. "Ow!... Ow!..."

Osaka hears the sound of metal rattling onto the floor. Still clutching her hip, she turns around completely to see the creature leaping back with a deep cut in its right wrist. Osaka turns her gaze downwards to the ground and spots two different butcher knives lying on the ground.

Osaka tilts her head quizzically. Had this monkey been just about to attack her when she had accidentally thrown her knife? She looks up at the creature again. Is this why the monkey had that cut?

"I s'pose that's fair then," Osaka says, her gaze becoming slightly more serious. "You cut off my hand, and I cut yours. Yeah." She nods.

There's a lot of blood dripping from the creature's cut wound. The hand is hanging limp by the creature's side. Maybe the knife penetrated deep enough to sever the nerves or something? Osaka shakes her head. She isn't sure.

Then, five seconds after the clatter had occurred, the idea occurs to Osaka that maybe she should take the knives out of the creature's reach.

Osaka steps forward, reaching out her left hand to grab the handles of the blades. The creature sees this coming and hisses menacingly, violently lashing out with its good hand.

Osaka recoils, clutching her left hand. It's red from the impact. "Ow!" Osaka cries, looking first at her hand, and then back at the creature. "That's the third pain I've got this morning! I got my hand cut off, that's one… I banged my hip, that's two… and finally, I got my hand smacked, that's three!" She holds up three fingers.

Osaka glares at the creature. "Seven more, and that's ten. Twenty-seven more, that's thirty. One more, that's four. Four more, that's seven. Seven more, that's-"

Osaka stops abruptly in mid-sentence. Osaka and the creature stare at each other for a while.

"I forgot where I was goin' with that," Osaka smiles sheepishly.

It's hard to tell what emotion the creature is showing, since it's not strictly speaking human. But Osaka has the impression that its face might be looking sorta incredulous.

Then, the creature suddenly darts forward, grabbing its weapon with enormous speed. However, Osaka had reacted just as quickly and had leapt forward to grab her weapon at the same time.

They both start jumping back, pulling the knives off of the kitchen floor. However, Osaka's grip on her knife is way too loose, so instead of pulling it back to her side, her knife goes flying forward and the blunt end of the knife smashes into the creature's good hand.

"Sorry, monkey-san!" Osaka yells. She looks down at her left hand. "Man, those things are heavy…" She shakes her hand.

Both of the weapons have clattered to the ground near the creature, and there's a painful looking bruise forming where the knife had just impacted. The creature looks absolutely livid. It seethes and glares and Osaka with immense fury.

"Now, I know you're not exactly human, and you don't have any eyes, but I think I'm startin' to bein' able to pick up on your facial expressions," Osaka says. "If you had eyes, I'm pretty sure you'd be glarin' at me right now. I think. Right?"

The creature does not change its stance.

"Also, I'm goin' t'guess that you're absolutely livid and that you're seethin' and you're glarin' at me _with immense fury_." Osaka holds up a finger. "At least, that's my prelinimary analysis. Is that close?"

The creature takes a step forward. Osaka takes a step backwards. She reaches back with her left arm, hovering close to the utensils rack next the sink. "Why, though?"

The creature shoots forward and thrusts its arms forward, aiming for the neck. Osaka pulls out a vegetable cutting knife super-quickly and holds it defensively in front of her.

The metal blade penetrates into the creature's chest as it approaches Osaka. The creature reflexively flinches back, landing a good distance away, but not before scratching Osaka's face and knocking the knife out of her grasp.

The knife didn't penetrate a vital area. After a short pause, the creature leaps forward again, but Osaka has pulled out another kitchen knife from out of the rack. The creature is forced to recoil again. Then it attacks again.

There are seven more kitchen knives in the rack. And then come two cork openers. Then four forks. Then three scissors. Then a Swiss Army knife. Then an exacto knife. Then forty-two chopsticks.

Now, the kitchen rack is much emptier, many nearby drawers are open, and there's over half a hundred sharp objects scattered around the floor near Osaka. There's also a lot more blood on the floor than there was before. The creature is standing a few paces away from Osaka, clutching its wounds. Osaka is panting, leaning back against the counter with numerous claw scratches on her face. She's just picked up an empty wine bottle.

"Y'know, I think I see the problem," Osaka says suddenly, standing up straight. "You're chargin' at me, but I'm the one who has the sharp objects. You're the one moving, so you're the one who's basically impalin' yourself on sharp objects over and over again. I think this is tirin' you out way more than me." Osaka puts down her wine bottle and puts her fingers to her chin, looking pensive. "What you should do is wait until I'm somewhere I don't have access to sharp objects. That way, you'd have the advantage. Y'look pretty strong. I'm sure that even though you can't use either of your hands, you can still easily overpower me if I don't have any weapons. So that'd be the ideal strategy here."

Osaka nods, satisfied with her explanation. Then, suddenly, her eyes snap open. "Oh no! School!" She whips her head around, looking for a clock. "I don't have time to make a lunch. Weh… I'll have to eat it after I get back today," Osaka says as she races out of the kitchen, heading towards the front door.

Osaka's running speed is marginally faster than her walking speed. Marginally.

She slides to a stop in front of the front door, halfway into her outside shoes. She turns and sees the creature running after her on its hind legs, back slouched, and leaving a pair of bloody trails behind.

"Oi, if you're going to follow me outside, I think you should put some clothes on," Osaka says, looking right and left. "Else everyone's goin' to laugh at you." She spots a jacket lying on the top of a table within reach. She grabs it and tosses it gently towards the creature. She misses by several meters.

"Put that on," Osaka says as she puts on her shoes, pulls her bag on her shoulders, slams open the front door, and rushes outside.

Maybe if she runs, she'll make it in time. She's already panting for breath after ten seconds.

As she rounds the corner, she spots a pair of orange pigtails a little ways down the road. "Ah, that's Chiyo-chan!" Osaka says with a relieved smile on her face. "I'm not too late, then. Chiyo-chan isn't the late type of person."

Chiyo-chan hears Osaka's voice and turns to greet her. "Ah, Osaka-san! Oha-"

Chiyo-chan stops dead in her tracks. "Um, Osaka-san, what happened to your hair?..."

Osaka is still a bit far away, though she's slowly getting closer.

"Ah, Osaka-san, are those scratch marks on your face? Are you ok-"

Chiyo-chan's hesitant smile drops out of existence. "O-Osaka-san… y-your hand!... Wh-what… H… Your hand's missing!"

"Huh?" Osaka, panting for breath, slides to a stop in front of Chiyo-chan. Osaka takes a look at her severed right wrist. Then she turns and looks at the sidewalk behind her. There's a faint blood trail. She straightens up and looks at her severed wrist again. Blood is dripping from it. "Ah… it started leaking…" Osaka puts her arms up to her head. "Ah, I should've iced my hand or something. I might've been able to save it… I was in such a hurry…"

"O-O-Osaka…" Chiyo-chan is looking back and forth between Osaka and Osaka's mutilated wrist.

"Chiyo-chan, how much blood is there in a human body?" Osaka asks innocently.

"Eh?" Chiyo-chan is at a loss for words.

"I lost a lot of blood earlier," Osaka explains. "I hope I'm in no danger of runnin' out."

"D-Did you call the paramedics?" Chiyo-chan stammers. "You need to get help right away!"

"Ah… there's another thing that I should've done but forgot to," Osaka sighs. "Come t'think of it, I forgot t'set my alarm last night. Oh, and also, I forgot to lock up. My parents are the one who usually do that."

Chiyo-chan had been slowly approaching Osaka to help, but then Chiyo-chan suddenly freezes completely. Her eyes are locked in horror on something behind Osaka.

"Why do all th'good ideas come in hindsight?" Osaka is saying. "There's that sayin' that goes 'hindsight is twenty twenty'."

Chiyo-chan is properly frightened for their lives. "O-O-Osaka-san! B-Behind you!" Chiyo-chan's body is shaking violently. She slowly lifts up her finger to point at the thing.

"What's twenty twenty mean? What're the units? Why not thirty, f'example? Or a hundred? Why did they decide twenty to be the perfect vision number?"

"O-O-O-Osaka!" Chiyo-chan has good reason to be frightened. The creature is hissing so vehemently that saliva bubbles are forming on its mouth. Also, the creature is covered in an abnormal amount of blood and cuts and wounds.

"I keep gettin' more ideas after the fact. Maybe I should've called th'police. Oh, and also, maybe I should've closed their eyes like they do in the movies." Osaka sighs. "Well, nothing's perfect."

Chiyo-chan is slowly backing away as the creature approaches. "O-Osaka, look behind you!" Chiyo-chan manages to squeak out.

Osaka turns her head and spots the creature. "Ah, I thought I told you to put on some clothes!" Osaka says to the creature, crossing her arms crossly. "It's not very socially acceptin' for you t'be walking naked everywhere."

Chiyo-chan isn't sure if she's more frightened by the creature, or by how nonchalantly Osaka is behaving in the presence of this creature.

The creature is shuffling closer and closer. Osaka isn't moving from her spot. Chiyo-chan is slowly backing away.

Finally, Chiyo-chan spins around and sprints into motion, sparing one last glance at Osaka's dripping wrist. "I-I'll get the nurse's office!" Chiyo-chan yells as she runs towards the school.

Osaka nods, remaining fixated on the infuriated creature. "…Well, I think I might have a spare uniform in my locker or something. I'll have you wear that." She turns and continues walking towards the school. The creature clenches its teeth. Some crack a bit under the pressure. Then it continues to go after Osaka.

* * *

"-and I can tell whose it is just by the looks on your faces," Yukari-sensei is saying with a smug smirk on her face. "So Tomo, turn that thing off!"

"Hehe," Tomo says sheepishly, deactivating her cell phone.

"Class has started," Yukari-sensei says. "So let's focus already and get this thing over with. Now then, first thing on-"

Yukari-sensei stops in mid-sentence. She has just spotted the two vacant seats in the middle of the classroom. "Huh, Chiyo-chan isn't here yet? That's a first."

"Whoa, that's true," Tomo says.

"How odd," Yomi comments.

"Maybe she finally got sick," Tomo says cheerfully.

"Heh, maybe a foreigner asked her for help," Yukari-sensei starts, giving Kagura a smug look. "And Little Miss Nice Girl just had to stay behind and help the guy out. Heh."

There's a bit a laughter.

"So, anyway…" Yukari-sensei trails off as she hears the classroom door slowly slide open.

Osaka is smiling like it's a typical day. It becomes even more disconcerting if you juxtapose her expression with the missing hand, the shortened hair, the scratch marks, and the blood stains.

Yukari-sensei takes one step away from the door. "Osaka…" Yukari-sensei begins warily, not sure of what to say. Osaka now has the undivided attention of the entire class.

Then, Yukari-sensei freezes in place and all of the colour drains from her face. Her eyes are locked on something behind Osaka. Right now, only Yukari-sensei is positioned to see what's behind Osaka.

Tomo notices Yukari-sensei's reaction. "Yukari-…"

Yukari-sensei's eyebrows begin arching as her eyes begin narrowing. Her lips begin curling upwards into a sneer. Her fists clench tighter and tighter. She slowly begins shifting into a battle-ready stance.

"…sensei?"

"YOU BASTARD!" Yukari-sensei hollers out, thrusting out an accusing finger.

"Eh." Osaka blinks.

With superhuman force, Yukari-sensei slams open a drawer in the teacher's podium and pulls out a gun. "Outta the WAY, OSAKA!" Yukari-sensei yells even as she cocks the gun.

"Why is that in there?" Yomi demands.

Osaka reacts fast enough to leap out of the way as Yukari-sensei unloads a volley of bullets, all aimed at the creature that had been standing behind Osaka.

Yukari-sensei is not a phys-ed teacher for a reason. All of her bullets completely miss, and one of the bullets somehow ends up hitting the window behind her. The creature didn't even have to make any attempt to dodge.

"くそ," Yukari-sensei swears as she discards the gun while pulling out a grenade from the drawer.

"Why the HELL do you have that in there?" Yomi yells, pointing at Yukari-sensei.

But Yukari-sensei is already pulling out the pin with her teeth and aiming it towards the doorway.

Osaka's eyes widen.

"Wait, she's not seriously-" Tomo starts.

_**BOOM!**_

Osaka is skittering along the wall towards the back of the room as the creature leaps into the room.

Sakaki has a "WTF?" expression on her face. Kagura is bolting up, slamming her hands on her desk. Yomi is whirling away, defensively holding up a notebook. Tomo's eyes are widening and her mouth is opening in shock. The other students are either shrieking, falling off their chairs, or just looking very surprised.

The creature lands on Yukari-sensei and gets in a few good slashes before being swatted off.

"How'd the hell you survive that?" Yukari-sensei demands, already reaching into the drawer for something else.

"He must've knocked the thing down the hallway b'fore it exploded," Osaka says to herself.

Yukari-sensei pulls out a machete, but the creature leaps forward and violently knocks it out of her grasp. The machete flies into the window, leaving a sizable crack.

"Why in the heck!" Yomi shouts.

"Kill it!" Yukari-sensei roars, jumping back and picking up an English textbook from off the ground. The creature leaps forward and slashes horizontally with enormous force, knocking the teacher's podium all the way across the room.

"It's flyin'," Osaka remarks with an unchanged expression, watching the podium smash itself into pieces on the far side of the room.

This display of the creature's strength freaks out the students in the class.

Adrenalin is a neurotransmitter.

Some of the students back up and hide underneath their desks, while others spring into action to try and hold off the creature.

Try.

"La lai?" Osaka says in bewilderment. "I'm pretty sure the monkey didn't look this strong when it was facin' me. Was it holdin' back or something?"

The creature is overpowering all of the people that are attacking it. There's a boy lying unconscious on the back of the room underneath a gigantic crack high on the wall. Also, there's no window anymore, and there are some people lying outside in the grass along with lots of shards of glass.

Now there are some broken desks lying outside, too. Not many of the desks in the classroom are standing upright anymore. There are some people using these knocked over desks to shield themselves from flying debris. Oh, and the classroom trebuchet is now out of commission as well.

Yukari-sensei has some deep gashes on her skin, and she's holding a pair of scissors. She's leaning against the chalkboard near the window. "Aim for the vital areas!" she shouts.

Tomo, Kagura, and three other boys leap onto the creature simultaneously in an attempt to hold it down. In a couple of violent slashes, all five of them are sent flying, smacking into various walls. They fall to the ground. Some of them twitch, but they don't get up.

"He's got some sharp claws," Osaka remarks as Sakaki faces off against the creature. The creatures hisses.

Osaka takes a quick look around the room. There's about six-ish people hiding behind desks. Three or four people standing near the back of the room, attempting to dodge stuff flying towards them. Another two have escaped out the window. The creature is too close to the doorway to escape that way. Six or eight are lying sorta unconscious near the front of the room, near the main battle. There's four-ish people lying outside in the grass. Also, four-ish are lying sorta unconscious in other parts of the room.

"That's goin' to take a lot of money to fix," Osaka sighs, looking around at the cracked walls, broken windows, and lots of other destroyed things in the room.

Maybe thirty seconds have passed since the grenade went off?

"What on earth is-" Minamo-sensei stops dead in her tracks in front of the door.

"Nyamo, it's here!" Yukari-sensei hisses.

"What is that?!" Minamo-sensei demands, taking a step back.

"Minamo!" Yukari-sensei yells.

"I'm going to call the police!" Minamo-sensei yells, running off into the hallway, swerving to avoid colliding with someone else.

With an enormous punch, Sakaki is sent flying backwards at near floor-level, smashing through many desks and one other person in her trajectory towards the back wall.

The creature is kneeling on the ground, panting hard, with a bloodied nose and lots more cuts and wounds and a twisted ankle and a few broken ribs and a dislocated shoulder.

With another punch, Yukari-sensei is more or less unconsciousness, sitting against a cracked wall.

"That's a lot more power than you showed against me," Osaka says. "You were holdin' back against me for some reason there in the kitchen. Was it because you're the one who showed up under my bed and killed my parents?"

Osaka's voice isn't hostile. It's as if she's just trying to figure out the solution to a normal, non-life-threatening word puzzle.

"Osaka?" Chiyo-chan says nervously, stepping into the room and taking in all of the devastation. The nurse is standing right behind Chiyo-chan, looking equally shocked.

"Y'know, if you knew I was awake, why didn't you just kill me just then?" Osaka puzzles. "Was it really necessary to wait until I gave myself away? What were you waiting for?"

"That… thing!" Chiyo-chan gasps, stepping back a step. She's feeling a bit dizzy from seeing all of the blood and unconscious bodies lying around in the room.

"A reaction, perhaps," Osaka says, tilting up her head to look at the ceiling. "Reactions are usually interesting. I always look forward to reactions in those dramatic irony things."

The creature bends down.

"Huh?" Osaka says.

The creature launches itself forward with enormous speed, catching Osaka by her neck with its non-dislocated arm.

Osaka instinctively puts up her hands to try and remove the hand from her neck. "My neck feels choked," she says.

"O-Osaka!" Chiyo-chan yells, putting her hand up to her mouth.

The creature hisses, squeezing its hand tighter.

"Y'know it's strange," Osaka says. "My vision is already going dark even though I should have enough oxygen for another 15 seconds. Why is that?"

_Click_. There's the sound of something detaching in the distance.

"Oh, that's right," Osaka realizes. "The blood vessels leadin' to my brain is also in my neck. So those'd be squeezed too, so that'd be slowin' the blood flow."

The creature's bloody teeth shows. It must've been using them to bite people. They look pretty sharp.

"Why 15 seconds, though?" Osaka whispers out.

_VRRRRZZZZZZZZZZZ!_ A pair of rapidly spinning orange footballs drill into the creature's back. The creature immediately releases Osaka and jumps to a safe distance away. Smoke is appearing from the creature's back. It growls, struggling to get up.

The now pigtail-less Chiyo-chan catches the two spinning orange pigtails as they sail back towards her. She has an unusually determined look on her face.

The nurse has presumably gone off to call for more paramedics.

"Don't hurt my friends," Chiyo-chan says, glaring at the creature. The creature turns towards Chiyo-chan, matching her glare.

Osaka is gasping for breath, clutching her throat, one eye open. "How does it get… around anyway if it's blind?... Echolocation?..."

Readying one arm to slash, the creature shoots forward.

Chiyo-chan reacts immediately, launching her drilling pigtails directly at the creature. This time, the pigtails drill into the creature's solar plexus and dislocated shoulder.

The creature hisses, struggling to maintain its ground. Then, with a burst of strength, it swats the two drilling pigtails away, sending one flying through the floor, and the floor below that, and the floor below that, and the other flying horizontally into the wall, and the wall after that, and the wall after that.

"Ack," Chiyo-chan gulps, stepping backwards. The creature leaps forward and swats Chiyo-chan horizontally. She is sent shooting past Osaka and slamming into the back wall. Chiyo-chan slumps to the floor, unconscious.

"Ah! Chiyo-chan!" Osaka turns and looks at the pigtail-less girl.

Some of the still conscious students in the class are trembling in fear.

The creature leaps forward and stabs into Osaka with its sharp claws. Osaka is holding up her left hand in defense, so the claws only go through her hand.

"Why is blood red?" Osaka says, looking at her bleeding hand, struggling to keep the claws away from herself.

The creature charges forward with its claws still stuck in Osaka's hand. Osaka slides backwards until she is pushed into the back wall. Chiyo-chan is slumped unconscious just a little bit to the left.

The claws slowly get closer and closer to Osaka. The claws penetrate deeper through Osaka's hand. Osaka diverts the claws to the left a bit, preventing them from stabbing a vital area. The claws go into Osaka's left shoulder-ish area, through the flesh, avoiding the bones, and then comes out the other side and into the wall.

"Now I'm stuck to the wall," Osaka whines.

The creature hisses viciously, and then opens its mouth wide.

"Are you goin' to eat me?" Osaka asks.

The creature closes its mouth, makes a glaring-like expression towards Osaka for a while before opening its mouth wide again.

"No, huh." Osaka looks up in contemplation. "If you have sharp teeth available, what'd be the best way to put me out of commission?"

The creature brings its teeth closer to Osaka's neck.

"Oh, that's right, I do have lots of veins 'n stuff in my throat, don't I," Osaka says.

Something rumbles in the distance, sort of like really far thunder. The creature immediately turns around, tensing up.

And then the roof of the entire school is torn off of its foundations.

The whole building is shaking violently. It's like a jet fly-by at an altitude of 50 meters.

Osaka looks up at the exposed blue sky. The roof is already hundreds of meters away. Osaka's ears are ringing like crazy.

There's a yellow blur and the creature is tackled away from Osaka. Its claws are pulled out of Osaka's body with immense force. Osaka is thrown forward away from the wall with her left arm stretched ahead of her.

Her left arm looks a little bit too long, and it hurts to try and move it around. "Is that what a shoulder dislocation feels like?" Osaka says, but she can't hear the words come out of her mouth.

A strange yellow cat thing is floating menacingly above the creature. The creature is lying on its back, still hissing.

_It's Chiyo's dad!_ Osaka realizes.

Chiyo-Dad seems to be speaking some angry words towards the creature. But all Osaka can hear is ringing.

_What's happening?_ Osaka thinks. _I want to know what's happening._ She wills herself to be able to hear.

Subtitles?

"…and you did well, my daughter, but I'll take it from here." Chiyo-Dad turns his gaze away from Chiyo-chan and turns it onto the creature.

The creature pulls itself to its feet. It readies its bloody claws.

Chiyo-Dad glares at the creature. He starts changing colours. He's angry.

The creature makes a sort of vicious sound thing. It flies forward and whirls its claws around, slashing everything in sight.

A few desks are chopped in half. Chairs, too. Several textbooks are torn into pieces.

_There's a replacement cost of 8000 yen,_ Osaka thinks, looking sadly upon the shreds of paper slowly floating to the ground.

The creature is sent flying to the ground with a resounding smack. "That attack isn't going to work," Chiyo-Dad booms. The scratch marks on his body are already healing.

The creature jumps into an upright position, grabs a nearby desk and hurls it towards Chiyo-Dad.

"Take this!" Chiyo-Dad says. He begins spinning. Faster and faster.

_It's many times faster than Chiyo-chan's pigtails_, Osaka realizes.

Chiyo-Dad, still whirling around, flips himself into a horizontal orientation and launches himself towards the creature.

The desk hits the whirling blur of colours and immediately dissolves into a shower of constituent pieces. Chiyo-Dad's momentum is completely unaffected.

Ineffectual.

The creature falters.

"DRILLLLLLLLLLL!"

They blast through the wall, and the wall after that, and the wall after that, and the wall after that, and the wall after that, and then out of the school and into the air.

Osaka struggles to her feet and stumbles over to the large hole in the wall. "Isn't this a little excessive?" she calls. "This is going to cost the school so much money!…" She looks through the tunnel of holes.

"Why is the sky blue?" she asks, spotting the blue sky at the end of the tunnel.

That blue sky is now obscured by a cloud of dust.

Osaka's hearing is still sketchy. Sounds are fading in and out of audibility. The ringing sometimes returns for a moment.

"...K.!"

Yes, very staticky.

The creature is leaking data, and one of its arms is missing. It's barely standing.

"Don't come back here again," Chiyo-Dad says, slowly floating down to a stop beside the creature.

"…" The creature is panting for breath.

The world is starting to whirl around. Osaka drops her knees. _I think this one is called vertigo_, she thinks. She looks up. The building is starting to lose its substance. A white light is seeping into her vision.

_Chiyo-chan?_ Osaka turns to where she had last seen Chiyo-chan. Osaka stares for a while. Even though she's looking directly at Chiyo-chan, it's hard to see her.

Osaka shuffles over to Chiyo-chan. Osaka tries to put a comforting hand on Chiyo-chan's shoulder. Wait, oh yeah, her right hand is missing. Oh yeah, and her left arm is dislocated.

"Hang in there, Chiyo-chan," Osaka says. Osaka turns her head to look at where Chiyo-Dad is.

The creature has its back up against a tree.

"This is the end!" Chiyo-Dad says. It holds out his arms as he begins spinning again. Faster and faster. And faster. And faster and faster and faster.

"It's many times faster again, Chiyo-chan," Osaka says, smiling.

The air is starting to swirl around the Chiyo-Dad flurry. The creature is actually shaking.

"Fear?" Osaka asks.

"TORRRRRRNADOOOOO!"

The cyclone expands and completely envelops a volume 85 meters in diameter.

The creature is thrown around and around. The piercing wind tears at it. It's tearing apart. It's losing its integrity. Data is being torn away.

The whirlwind is the only thing that Osaka can see. Everything else is just whiteness.

"Monkey-san…" Osaka says.

It can't be maintained anymore. The creature grimaces. No choice. It's going to have to plug out…

* * *

_How do I know that?_ is the first thought that Osaka has as she wakes up.

Osaka is extremely disoriented. More so than usual. Where is she? When is it? What posture is she even in?

Is she at home in her bed? Is it a school day or a weekend?

A… school day.

Voices.

Someone's here. Did she fall asleep during a study session with her friends? Did she fall asleep at her own home and now it's time for dinner?

She's sitting. It's not nighttime.

Her shoes are on. She's outside. At school?

Is it in class, or is it lunchtime, or is it after school?

Classmate voices.

Right, definitely school, then.

She recognizes the texture of the surface that she's resting on. It feels like a school desk.

Osaka slowly opens her eyes. Everything's blurry. There's someone standing right there.

Yukari-sensei?

Things slowly come into focus. Voices become legible.

"Osaka?" Yukari-sensei says with a concerned look on her face.

Osaka sits up, yawning. She wipes the drool off of her face with her right sleeve.

_My hand's back_, Osaka realizes, looking at her sleeve. She hesitantly moves her left arm around. _That's un-dislocated, too._ She looks down at her desk. She takes her left sleeve and starts wiping the drool off of it.

"We've been calling you for over a minute now," Yukari-sensei says, standing up straight. "That's unusual, even for you. You okay?"

Osaka looks around. She notices the undamaged classroom. She notices the unhurt students. Most of them are standing crowded around her desk. They all look pretty concerned.

Osaka looks up. She sees an pigtailed unhurt Chiyo-chan standing right beside Yukari-sensei.

"Ah, Chiyo-chan, you're okay," Osaka says with a relieved look on her face.

Osaka takes her right hand and presses it to her chest, checking her own heart rate. She hadn't noticed earlier, but it's racing.

"Um, yes…" Chiyo-chan says nervously, looking at Osaka with concern.

Yukari-sensei notices how Osaka has her hand on her heart.

"Mm… why don't you go to the nurse's office?" Yukari-sensei suggests, trying to sound indifferent. "Naturally, one would be concerned about you right now."

"Yes, you really should," Chiyo-chan says.

Osaka blinks. The events of the dream are fresh in her mind. All of the details are still very vivid.

"Yes, okay," Osaka says, reaching into her desk and pulling out a green notebook and a pen. She takes these two items with her as she gets up and walks to the door.

The students slowly return to their desks.

"I expect you to return to the class after you'll feeling better," Yukari-sensei says, giving Osaka a sharp look. "Don't get into the habit of skipping classes, alright?"

"Mm, mm," Osaka says, walking out of the classroom without looking up.

Yukari-sensei sighs, and then resumes the English lesson.

* * *

The dream had been unusually vivid. The dream is taking much longer than usual dreams to fade from Osaka's memory.

So, Osaka does the logical thing and writes down everything that she can remember about the dream into her green notebook while resting in the nurse's office.

Then, she disregards the dream and returns to _nichijou_ things.

* * *

**あずまんが大王 - Azumanga Daioh, Azuma Kiyohiko**


End file.
